Sad & wonderful all at the same time?

Friday was our 5th wedding anniversary, YAY- awesome!!! Got picked up Friday night at the airport by my fav people in the whole world-nice. Got up Saturday, took Bo to be put down-heart breaking. Saturday night dinner with Marks extended family- nice. Sunday celebrated anniversary by seeing African Cats movie and dinner at Tuscany- wonderful. We've been talking about Bo for a few months now, he's been on meds for his arthritis for over a year now and his ability to get around has just declined in the last 6 months or so quickly. Aside from the fact that he's pretty incontinent, any excitement at all is a bad bad thing. We talked with the boys and decided it was time. There was a fair amount of guilt in just talking about it but rationally it was the right thing. When Bo greeted us on Friday night it was a slap of reality. The rest of the night was just about giving him extra love and attention. We took a couple of last minute pics and Collin slept on our floor with Bo. When it was time to go Bo was so excited to go on a ride, it felt wrong. He was grinning and licking his eyeballs like a little fiend. The tears started as soon as we got going in the car. Once we got to the vet I couldn't even look at the little vet tech and Bo is still so excited, smiling and tail wagging. Dr. Wilson gave him a shot to put him asleep before the final shot. It took him a few minutes to fall asleep and those last couple of minutes were Bo in his finest. Alternating licking the air and his eyeballs moving into purring and finally snoring. We stayed through the final shot so he wouldn't be alone and all I could think was that I hoped he knew how loved he was. Even as I'm typing I'm crying and hoping he knew. Coming home and not having him greet us was hard, much harder than I thought it would be.
Sunday was a much better day. Ran a couple of errands, coming in the door was a bitch. The tears came before I pulled in the driveway just knowing he wasn't meeting me at the door. Planted a couple of flowers and got ready to go out. The movie was visually stunning, Samuel L Jackson seems like an odd choice of narrator but worth the time on the big screen if you like nature movies. Dinner at Tuscany was awesome, so relaxing and fun. Mark gave me a beautiful solitaire necklace, he is finally getting his Springfield 911 and is very excited. I can't believe it's only been five years. It still feels so new but it feels like all is right in the world. Love you babe!